An Abundance of Katherines

By John Green

From the number 1 bestselling writer of The Fault in Our Stars

Michael L. Printz Honor Book
Los Angeles occasions ebook Prize Finalist

When it involves relationships, Colin Singleton’s kind is ladies named Katherine. And in terms of women named Katherine, Colin is often getting dumped. Nineteen instances, to be detailed. On a highway journey miles from domestic, this anagram-happy, washed-up baby prodigy has 10000 cash in his pocket, a bloodthirsty feral hog on his path, and an obese, pass judgement on Judy–loving ally using shotgun—but no Katherines. Colin is on a challenge to turn out the theory of Underlying Katherine Predictability, which he hopes will are expecting the way forward for any courting, avenge Dumpees in every single place, and eventually win him the woman. Love, friendship, and a lifeless Austro-Hungarian archduke upload as much as spectacular and heart-changing conclusions during this ingeniously layered comedian novel approximately reinventing oneself.

 

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And he’s purely received one eye, you recognize. Fought within the first struggle. good at some point, we was once on the shop and daddy gave me one crimson penny and that i ran as much as the counter there and that i acknowledged, ‘Doctor Dinzanfar, do you will have any penny sweet? ’ And he seemed down at me, and he stated, ‘I’m sorry, Mabel. We don’t have any penny sweet in Gutshot. All we acquired is loose sweet. ”’ Mabel closed her eyes as all of them allow the tale sink in a piece. She appeared nearly asleep, her respiring sluggish and rhythmic, yet then her eyes snapped open and she or he stated, “Lindsey, I definite overlooked seeing you.

And to Colin’s brain, at the very least, there has been a deeper repetition: whenever, Katherines dumped him simply because they simply didn’t like him. They each one got here to exactly an identical end approximately him. He wasn’t cool sufficient or handsome adequate or as shrewdpermanent as they’d hoped—in brief, he didn’t subject adequate. And so it occurred to him repeatedly, until eventually it used to be dull. yet monotony doesn’t make for painlessness. within the first century CE, Roman gurus punished St. Apollonia by way of crushing her tooth one after the other with pliers.

It used to be the 1st time considering the fact that arriving in Gutshot that he’d crushed the hen to waking. instantly, he opened his bed room window, pressed his face up opposed to the reveal, and shouted, “COCK-A-DOODLE DOO! HOW DO you're keen on IT FROM the opposite finish, YOU LITTLE FUGGER? ” He brushed his tooth after which acquired within the bathe. He saved the water coldish so one can get up. Hassan got here in to sweep his enamel and shouted over the working water, “Kafir, i will be able to say it with self belief: this day is an afternoon that no pigs will die. I’m now not even allowed to devour the motherfuggers;72 I’m convinced not likely to kill one.

Half-crouched at the back of a chest-high rack of potato chips, Colin tugged on Hassan’s T-shirt, cupped his quit Hassan’s ear, and whispered, “Talk to her. ” other than the truth is Colin didn't whisper, simply because he had by no means fairly mastered the paintings of whispering—he simply type of talked in a touch softer voice at once into Hassan’s eardrum. Hassan winced and shook his head. “What’s the entire zone, in sq. miles, of the kingdom of Kansas? ” he whispered. “Um, round 82,200; why? ” “I simply locate it a laugh that you just comprehend that yet can’t determine the way to converse with out utilizing your vocal cords.

After which I see Colin operating as much as my condo with a bit cardboard field. And he’s the cutest boy at school and the single one from Gutshot who’s well known. He places the field on my doorstep after which earrings the doorbell and runs off and that i run down there and my heart’s beating like loopy and I’m so hopeful that he’s acquired this mystery weigh down on me and that i get down there and there’s this rather elaborately embellished cardboard field with red-construction-paper hearts pasted everywhere it. . . . God, I hadn’t considered this in see you later until eventually he referred to as me Lass.

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